I recently had to deal with a stalker.
This was something new for me. You hear about these things in the entertainment industry, and elsewhere. But these are just stories. They can’t possibly happen to you.
And when it did, the people you turn to for help, like I did with my mom, seem to think that you did something to bring it about. Making you feel even more like a victim.
I’m not certain when i started to really feel that things were getting out of hand.
I had met this man, who was older, at rehab a few months ago. we fast became friends, although I was aware that part of the reason was due to the fact that I reminded him of his ex boyfriend. When I confronted him on this, he denied it however, and being lonely, and just recently having moved back to Toronto, I accepted that.
We entertained our addictions on the occasion, and even screwed around. He was someone I felt that I could open up to, but I also told him straight up I wasn’t interested in pursuing it any further than that. And I never used him. Rather, it was more the reverse. He needed me to provide him with an excuse to justify his addictions, like he wasn’t going to do them regardless.
Things went from bad to worse last week, when my mom came in from Montreal. Phone calls all hours, day or night, to the point where I had to turn my phone off. He wouldn’t believe me when I told him I was busy, calling back to verify, until my mom answered the phone and told him to bug off!! He called other acquaintances to check up on my actions….
Finally, I had enough. I had tried to be fair, I had tried to understand, but enough was enough. Except I couldn’t call out from my house. Every time I picked up the receiver he was on the other end. I had to go downstairs to the lobby to make a call to the police. 3 hours later, when they arrived and I turned on the phone, he was still there. I just handed the phone over to the officer and let them deal with it.
He has since been warned, and I have the ECOP FILE # (106-9732). I also have told him since then, after he fired off a couple of nasty emails, that i was saving those as well. I don’t know if I should go to to the Justice of the Peace and swear out a complaint. I suppose I should,l but he was my friend. These things aren’t supposed to happen with friends, right?
I’ve included a web page so that I can refer back to this, and see what others have recommended (http://www.antistalking.com/victim.htm). I have also had call block installed. Hopefully, this will be the end of it.